You think everything they do is wonderful. Being in love can make you feel on top of the world, but it can also make you nervous and edgy.
You get a strange, restless feeling when you see the person. You might even get stomach ache. You can’t help smiling. You don’t know what to say when you see them – or you talk too much because you’re trying to impress them. If all this sounds familiar, you’re probably in love!
If you want to know whether the other person feels the same way about you, trust your feelings. Often you can feel whether someone is interested. If you’re not sure, be brave! Try to get into a situation where you’ve got a chance to talk to the person. You could also send them a text message or try to make contact on MSN. If you notice they’re not really responding or they’re even trying to avoid you, there’s a good chance they don’t return your feelings.
What’s the message?
Bear in mind, however, that there’s an extra tricky puzzle in the love game: some people can be standoffish even if they’re really attracted to you, because they don’t know how to cope with their feelings! Or maybe they feel they shouldn’t be responding to your advances even if they’d like to. So don’t immediately think a girl or boy isn’t interested in you because they don’t respond straight away.
On the other hand, if you try to make contact a couple of times and still draw a blank, it’s time to get the message. Otherwise, give them space. Pressurising or hassling someone won’t make them more interested in you. It might come to nothing, but be patient, their feelings for you could also grow. If you get a clear no, move on and leave the person alone.
Sometimes love stories have a happy ending, but not always. Perhaps you fall in love with someone but they don’t feel the same way about you. Or your girlfriend or boyfriend finishes with you. Or you’re in love, but because of the circumstances – perhaps family pressure, feelings of responsibility, religious belief, an arranged marriage to someone else – you’re not able to take the relationship further. Or you’re in love, but for some reason you have to spend a lot of time apart. Love can really hurt.
It’s a cliché but it’s true. When your heart is broken, it’s hard to believe you’ll ever feel any different again. But you will. It takes time. Try to find something to distract you – play sport or listen to music. Talk about it with a good friend, put your feelings into poems or songs. And remember, in love, everyone gets hurt sometime. Even the most popular girl or boy in the class.
Love and sex
Many people only have sex with someone they’re in love with or whom they love. But love isn’t the same as sex and sex isn’t the same as love. You can also have sex out of lust, just for the pleasure of having sex. But for most people, deeper pleasure comes from having sex with someone you love.