“Urgent! I have been with my boyfriend for six years and he has never spoken once about settling down. He has never introduced me to his friends and family. I have this feeling that this relationship will not lead to marriage yet he won’t let me go. What will I do if he disappoints me?”
You have to tell this guy what you want. Tell him that you would like to be in a committed relationship that is geared towards marriage and a family. Tell him that you would like him to be the guy that you create this family with. Then ask him if that’s what he wants. If he says yes, then say that for you one of the signs of seriousness is being involved in all areas of his life, and knowing his friends and family. Ask him to commit to introducing you within a specific time frame, say two or three months.
In the movies, relationships fall into place effortlessly, and both lovers seem somewhat psychic when it comes to the others’ needs and desires. Reality is different, and we have to say what we want and expect. Your man says he loves you, now you have to tell him and show him how to love you. You want him to claim you to the people who matter to him. These are not bizarre or unusual requests and he should honour them.
If he does not change in the agreed time frame, you will then have a tough choice to make. But you will have a clearer picture of exactly where you stand with this man. Right now, all you have are vague ‘feelings’ that he will not marry you, and fear that this will hurt you and embarrass you in front of your friends and family. It will hurt like hell, if he does not want you in his life permanently. In fact, it will feel like your world is ending. But it won’t end. You will not only survive, but you will also get to a point where you are proud of yourself for pursuing what you want.